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May 26, 2006
Another Friday in La La Land
It's Friday, right on !
It's been a somewhat interesting week.
Unfortunately the two squirrels we adopted last weekend died however we found another one on Wednesday and so far our efforts with this one have not been in vain. It's healthy and it sticks close to "home" when it's out of its cage so hopefully this one will make it. Our only concern is that it may become too tame and decide it wants to move in. I have to admit I haven't helped the situation as I'm always petting it and playing with it (the squirrel !)
The weather seems to have finally cleared up once and for all. The last few days have been sunny and warm and predictions are that it will stay that way for a while. It's about time !
On a sort of weather related note, or maybe not, my arthritis gave me considerable grief this week. I was in semi-serious pain until today. This morning seems a little better, at least I can type without it hurting. The aformentioned squirrel bit me the day before yesterday so I called one of those health lines to see if there was anything in particular I should do. One of the questions the nurse asked me was "on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate the pain?" Well, compared to a really bad day with rheumatoid arthritis I'd say a 1. Seriuously, when you've lived with chronic pain that varies in intensity from a minor annoyance to wanting to cut your arm off, a squirrel bite pales in comparison.
A friend of ours is celebrating her 50th bithday tomorrow. At first I thought it was a joke, then I remembered I'll be 50 next year, so I guess it's true.
Anyway, that's it for now. Have a great day and a great weekend folks.
BTW, I was going to post a picture of myself naked, but who the hell cares.
Posted by OldGuy at 8:39 AM | Comments (9)
May 25, 2006
A Momentous Decision
The day he made the momentous decision he felt a peace he'd never felt before.
He'd spent weeks thinking about it, mulling over the pros and cons and examining the issue from every angle.
His family said he was resistant to change, he would never do it, not in a million years.
He would show them, he would show them all !
He thought he should eat first, then shower and shave, might as well be at his best.
He prepared himself a big steak with mushrooms on the side, his favourite meal, and had a glass of dry red wine to go with it.
Then he headed to the bathroom, stripped off all his clothes, shaved, and had a long hot shower.
He brushed his teeth, put on some deodorant and a splash of his favourite cologne.
He went to his bedroom to get dressed.
He took his time, wanting to look perfect.
He put on his best suit and the new tie he had purchased.
Once dressed he went back to the kitchen, poured himself a scotch, and drank it in one gulp.
It was time !
He went to the bathroom and saw the instrument of his redemption right where he'd left it.
He picked it up with trembling fingers and examined it one last time.
Then he reached under the counter, took out a roll of toilet paper, placed it on the tube, and inserted it into the holder with the paper coming out over the top !
It would take some getting used to but he thought he could do it given time.
Posted by OldGuy at 9:55 AM | Comments (4)
May 21, 2006
Sunday Morning Musings
Another week, another Sunday. Seems Like I was just here a few days ago. Oh yeah, I was .
The princess and I went to see the movie "Over the Hedge" today. It was pretty good as kids movies go, very funny. If you have kids I recommend it. It's about a bunch of forest creatures that suddenly get thrust into civilization and the antics that ensue. I won't tell you anymore, wouldn't want to spoil it for you.
We adopted a couple of baby squirrels this week. It seems they were abandoned by their mother, and I'm pretty sure they would have died but us and the neighbours decided we couldn't let that happen so for the last few days we gave them food and water, but because it's been so cold lately they weren't doing so well.
Anyway, tonight the neighbour and the princess and myself built them a cozy little home complete with bedding, food, and a hole just big enough for them to get in and out, but too big for cats and dogs to get in, so hopefully they'll be safe. They've gotten quite tame, we were even petting them tonight and one of them crawled up onto my shoulder and perched there while we were working on its house. The princess is totally enamoured of them and has even given them names. We all hope they survive but of course we did explain to her that they might not make it so she wouldn't be too upset if they died. As of tonight though they looked in pretty good shape, much better than they did yesterday.
On a related note, the princess was asking how mommy squirrels feed their babies yesterday and of course this led to her asking how human mommies do it. She thought breast feeding was funny but silly.
It's a long weekend here, Queen Victoria's birthday. The old broad is really starting to look her age !
I started the heart yesterday and finished it today when the princess decided what colour she wanted it. I'm especially proud of the fact that I didn't follow a tutorial, nor look at a picture. I was just fooling around in Photoshop and decided I wanted to make something sparkly again. I went a little crazy with the sparkles but what the heck, the princess likes it. I'm really starting to get the hang of Photoshop, and I'm finally starting to experiment with trying stuff on my own instead of just surfing the net for tutorials.
Anyway, I was up late last night so I'm outta here.
Have a great week folks.
Posted by OldGuy at 8:40 PM | Comments (3)
May 18, 2006
Just More Stuff
I'm working on another neon desktop, this one for my son. I was debating doing something risque but then I remembered the princess would see it and she's only 8. Plus my wife wouldn't be too happy, even if I did call it art.
Yeah, I'm into neon right now. I'll get over it in a while and move onto something else but it's fun to be able to do stuff like this.
I went to the museum with my princess's class the day before yesterday as they needed chaperones. Before I left my wife said "I hope you don't get Nick B. or Jacob in your group because they're a handful." Well, I didn't get Nick B. or Jacob, I got Nick B. and Jacob. When the princess saw the list she immediately commented "Oh my God dad, they put them together, somebody made a mistake." Well, it wasn't the end of the world of course, but they were indeed a handful, especially as they feed off each other, as young kids are wont to do.
The Princess got her new furniture, and she absolutely loves it. Thank God, because the stuff weighs a ton and the guys who had to get it upstairs worked like buggers to do it. Me, I'm still hurting from taking the old stuff out.
Well, not much else happening right now, so that's it for today folks.
Posted by OldGuy at 3:18 PM | Comments (2)
May 16, 2006
Macho, Macho Man
This one is for all you guys out there so women leave the room.
Okay, so now that all you guys are paying attention, I have a question for you.
When do you cross the line between macho and stupid ?
I'm asking because I crossed that line tonight.
Here's what happened.
My daughter's new bedroom furniture is being delivered tomorrow so my wife said we had to empty her room tonight. As she was taking the princess to her jump rope lessons I said I'd get a start on the job, you know, move a few little things out.
As soon as she left I decided to show her what a tough guy I am. In other words, I decided to move all the furniture out by myself.
Now, I'm about 5'9", 135 lbs., and have nasty arthritis so this is when the aforementioned line started to get a little blurred.
I got the mattress and out and managed to get the box spring to the garage, a mere two flights down.
Ditto her dressing table and a couple of small shelves, although I must admit my back was starting to feel it just a wee bit.
Then I tackled her dresser.
Which was when that line became completely invisible and I crossed it without so much as a how do you do.
A few minutes later, as I was deperately trying to hang onto the dresser and praying that it wouldn't run right over me, crushing me like an insignificant little ant, I realized my mistake.
I was stupid to have tried to move it alone !
It's okay guys, the ladies aren't reading this, so you can commiserate, shake your heads and go "man, the poor bastard, I know how he feels".
After about ten minutes of struggling with that nasty piece of furniture I finally got it into the garage, my back singing a song of agony, and my groin providing backup.
So, since no ladies are reading this I will admit it guys, "I crossed the line, I did a stupid thing."
Fortunately my wife doesn't know.
(Guys, you can let the ladies back into the room now, the rest of the post is for everybody).
On another note, I redid the desktop for my daughter, fancied it up a bit. She really likes it, thinks I'm way cool. And strong too, not like her mommy, who may have figured out I'm in serious hurt and why, and thinks I'm a dumbass.
Anyway, it's the middle of the night so time for more Tylenol then back to bed (guys, don't tell the ladies why I need it, better yet, tell em I have a headache).
Posted by OldGuy at 12:47 AM | Comments (4)
May 15, 2006
You're a Star Baby !
The gamblers made it back safe and sound yesterday, and they were even up $5, so that isn't too bad. They had fun, and my son even bought his first legal beer. He bought a large one at a corner store and brought it home so he and I could share it while watching a movie. Funny thing, when I picked up this morning his mug was still sitting there full. I don't think he had a single drop.
Good for him I say !
The picture is another desktop I did for the princess on the weekend. Again, nothing too fancy, but when we were out on Saturday night the restaurant had a lot of neon signs around, and I thought, "hey, I've done neon, and I have a couple of pictures of theatre marquees I downloaded to get an idea of what they look like", so yesterday I just put the two together and came up with this.
Posted by OldGuy at 8:47 AM | Comments (2)
May 14, 2006
Sunday Morning Musings
I managed to make it here today after all but only because my wife and son are out.
As I mentioned previously, my son's 18th birthday is today, and of course, it's also Mother's Day.
We had a late brunch today then the two of them headed over to the casino. Neither one has ever been (neither have I) but because it's in Quebec, legal age is 18 so his mom wanted to take him. In Ontario, or as we say around here, on this side of the river, legal age is 19. They'll be back in a few hours, hopefully with some money left over.
We went out to dinner last night, and grandma and my wife's brother joined us. We went to a local Tex-Mex place, the lad's choice and had an excellent meal. Most of them had fajitas, but I had a country fried steak. It's been a few years since I had one and it was as tasty as ever.
Anyway, it's just me and the princess right now so I can't stay long. Later, when the gamblers get back they're bringing home Chinese food, then the lad and I are watching a movie.
Overall a pretty good day, with just one small hitch. The princess woke me up at 7 a.m. today to make breakfast for her mom. The thought was lovely but 7 a.m. ? Oh well, she was excited.
The picture is the desktop I did for the princess this week. Nothing too fancy but it's the first thing (other than straight text) that I've done without a tutorial. I saw the picture on the net the other day and decided I'd try to reproduce it. It turned out okay.
Anyway, cheers and have a great week folks.
And to all you moms out there,
Posted by OldGuy at 4:06 PM | Comments (2)
May 12, 2006
A Day in the Life
The old man stood in the rain waiting for the light to change.
Suddenly a bus roared past. He stepped back to avoid getting soaked but he was drenched to the knees.
That was the second time this week he'd peed his pants.
He went home and changed.
Into a chicken.
He laid around the house for a while, then, when he was satisfied he'd laid enough, he changed back.
He went upstairs to get fresh underwear.
He opened his drawers, peeked inside, tickled himself, then opened the top drawer of his dresser, where he kept his underwear.
Jockey sorts or silk panties ?
He opted for mustard coloured silk panties.
He slid them on, relishing their soft, smooth texture as they slid up his bare legs.
He realized he was hungry so he went to the kitchen to make himself a hamburger.
As he opened the refigerator he heard something behind him.
He turned, pulled his gun and fired.
That was the third brou ha ha he'd shot this week.
It died an agonizing death.
He put his gun back in his pants and zipped his fly.
Then he went to the window, unzipped it and let it go.
He ate his hamburger, looked out the window, saw the sun had come out, and decided to sit out on the porch.
He went out, sat in his favourite rocking chair, and, forgetting he was an albino, decided to have a nap in the warm sun.
He awoke a few hours later, fried to a crisp.
Posted by OldGuy at 9:48 AM | Comments (3)
May 10, 2006
A Princess is Chosen
Once upon a time there lived a lovely young princess by the name of Rhonda.
Princess Rhonda was a somewhat caring person, that is, sometimes she cared about the peasants, and sometimes she cared to party. Everywhere Princess Rhonda went she would hear cries of "help me Rhonda." She usually tried to help, except when she was at the beach hanging with the boys, then she preferred the peasants stay away.
One day Princess Rhonda and her friends decided to go to a movie. Her boyfriend, The Duke of Earl, said his car was in the shop for repairs so Princess Rhonda gave him her keys and said "baby, you can drive my car."
So they headed off. A few minutes later the duke tried to pass a big truck but there was another big truck coming the other way, and try as he might to avoid it, even screaming at the others to "shift right you buggers, I need the extra weight" he hit the truck head on, and they were all killed instantly. Which proves that you can't always get by with a little help from your friends.
A big state funeral was held, and people from all over the world came to pay their respects. Unfortunately the organist had eaten brownies for breakfast, unaware that they had been baked by his 16 year old son, who forgot to hide them afterwards, so when it came time to play the funeral march he launched into a rousing rendition of Viva Las Vegas instead.
When all the brou ha ha had died down, so to speak, unless you're a mute and then you can't speak so you learn sign language, and sometimes when you're all alone you amuse yourself by making shadow puppets coz now you're really good at it, the king and queen realized that as Princess Rhonda had been their sole heir, and as the king had suffered a little tattooing accident a few years earlier, their only option was to hold a contest to choose a replacement for their daughter.
They held auditions throughout the land and soon they were down to a dozen contestants. The king and queen decided to televise the finals and let the peasants vote, so as to make the contest seem democratic. They even enlisted a few members of the court to add a little spice to the event. There was Count Randy, a big, blustery fellow who always said things like "you rocked up there baby", Lady Paula, a pretty but vacuous brunette who couldn't keep her hands off herself, and Bishop Simon, a mean and nasty fellow, who, it was said, often bashed his own bishop in the privacy of his room while envisioning himself and Lady Paula locked in a passionate embrace.
So a princess was chosen, and on the day of her coronation the new organist performed quite admirably.
And her first official act was to order Bishop Simon beheaded because he said her performance during the finals was "one of the worst I have ever seen, you looked like Madonna trying to pass for royalty." And as Bishop Simon was lead to the place of execution the crowd could be heard singing "You Had a Bad Day."
Posted by OldGuy at 9:58 AM | Comments (3)
May 9, 2006
If It's Tuesday This Must Be Belgium
I know, I know, I missed another Sunday.
Truth is it was another very busy Sunday, seems they get that way when the weather warms up (although I must admit the princess and I went swimming at an indoor pool on Sunday). Anyway, by the time I even thought of blogging it was late and my choices were blog or go to bed. It was a no-brainer. And this Sunday is Mother's Day and my son's birthday so ... well, hopefully I'll find 5 minutes to spare.
On another note, I'm making my daughter a new desktop. I'm playing around with some ideas, going to include the princess theme somehow. I also downloaded a bunch of new fonts yesterday, I'll probably use something very fancy and make it all shiny. Wish me luck, it's my first attempt at something fairly large using Photoshop, and maybe Illustrator.
I wore my red summer jacket for the first time today, it looked good with my sneakers, the ones with the red highlights. I like red, it says "hey, I'm feeling good today, crank up the volume on that music and get me a beer."
On a sad note however, I noticed several more grey hairs on my chest this morning. I first noticed a couple a month or two ago and have been keeping an eye on them since. Several more turned grey overnight. At least it seems like overnight. Another thing, you ever notice how long the grey ones get, and they stick right out too, almost like they're saying "ha ha, look at me you old fart." My wife has been bugging me for the longest time to use Grecian formula because I'm getting a little salt and pepper on the dome but up until now I've refused. In light of recent events I may have to rethink my position. Of course, as long as I don't get any down ... oh damn !
One other thing. Someone left a comment on one of my old posts today, "Signs of Fall", asking if I thought house prices were going down. I've been wondering all day why the heck they asked that and I finally figured it out. They must have just read the title and figured I was talking about house prices falling. Makes you wonder eh ?
Sorry, one more thing I had to add. I was just at a friend's blog and one of the comments posted on it was rather rude, and it really offended me. If you don't like something why not just say "I don't like it" and leave it at that. Saying something is ugly and makes you barf hurts people's feelings.
Posted by OldGuy at 10:48 AM | Comments (2)
May 5, 2006
The Choice
On the eve of the biggest heist of his career, over $20,000,000 in diamonds, Jake was faced with a dilemna.
The hospital had just called and his mother was dying. She had been ill with cancer for several months and now she wasn't expected to make it until morning.
But there was the job, the one Jake and his partners had been planning for months, and Jake's role was crucial. He was the fake buyer who purchased the diamonds for $20,000,000 in counterfeit money. Then his limo driver/pilot would take him to the airport where he would hop a private flight to South America and sell the diamonds for half that, a cool $10,000,000, which he would split between the driver/pilot, one of his partners, and the guy who set up the buy. If Jake didn't show up, thus blowing this job, they wouldn't hesitate to hunt him down and kill him.
But there were two things Jake had sworn he would never do; he wouldn't kill anyone, he'd held to that one; and he wouldn't hurt his mother, he'd held to that one too, and he wouldn't do it now that she was dying.
So he made the only choice he could. He walked to his car, drove to the hospital, and spent the night with his mother, easing her dying.
And in the process signed his own death warrant.
And speaking of diamonds, I've been playing with text again. Yeah, I came across one of the first things I did a few months ago and decided to see if I could do it better, so I went crazy with it, added glows and bevels and filters and all sorts of stuff and came up with this. It looks great full-sized on my desktop against the black background, it's so shiny it almost hurts the eyes !
Posted by OldGuy at 12:30 PM | Comments (2)
May 4, 2006
What Day Is It ?
It's Thursday right ?
Just asking because it's been another busy week, and I'm losing track of time. I think I blogged a few days ago, but maybe it was longer than that. I seem to remember listening to the Rolling Stones latest album while I was writing.
What's that, they haven't put out a new album since when ?
Oh, then I guess it has been a busy week ... month ... year ... whatever.
Anyway, it's Thursday and time is just flying by. I've noticed it does that when the weather warms up. Maybe it's because I'm spending more time outside. Or maybe it's just because I have more fun when it's warm and you know what they say, "fun flies when you're having time." Or something like that.
I smacked my left elbow a couple of days ago, rolled off the couch and landed right on it. It swelled up pretty good, but being the macho man that I am I didn't go to the doctor until yesterday, and only went then coz my wife was getting insistent, she does that a lot. She's usually right too. Anyway, turns out I burst a blood vessel in there and the joint was swimming in blood (sounds like the opening line for a creepy story). The doctor said it was a good thing I came in because there's two things they absolutely have to take out of a joint, pus and blood. Pus because it means the joint's infected, and blood because it can lead to infection. So he froze the joint, took out a needle the size of a turkey baster (this after already poking around with a small one), and , after jabbing me 3-4 times he sucked er out good. And then his face changed, it became vulpine, his eyebrows drew together, his lips peeled back, revealing long white teeth, and in a voice that sounded like it came from the grave he said "blood is the life."
Okay, so maybe I'm exegarating a little but it was a big needle and he certainly did appear to be enjoying himself.
Anyway, he got most of the blood out but it's still swollen and sore, apparently it will be for a few days.
On a happier note, the princess was on tv again this morning. One of the local stations was giving away Ottawa Senators (our local NHL team) stuff so she and her mother went down. She got a banner for the car, a jersey, and got on tv for a few moments. I'm sure I'll get all the details when I get home.
Anyway, I gotta get back to work so I'll see you folks tomorrow.
Posted by OldGuy at 1:26 PM | Comments (2)
May 1, 2006
Sunday Morning Musings on A Monday Afternoon
I didn't make it to the tree house yesterday. On a Sunday. I'm so ashamed. Okay, I'm not really ashamed, but I am apologetic. It was such a nice day I was outside most of the day puttering in the garage and keeping an eye on the princess and her friend while they played, then when I went in the house I wasn't at the computer for more than 10-15 minutes when it was time to make dinner, and after that I cleaned up the princess's furniture so she could have her room back (you'll recall I painted it last weekend); she's getting new furniture in a week or two but in the meantime she needs some space. And after all that I was just too tired to sit at the computer so I read a bit and crashed on the couch.
Anyway it's the first of May and it's an absolutely gorgeous day so I can hardly wait to get home and take the princess to the park.
Oh hey, here's a silly concidence. I was explaining the difference between bees and wasps to the princess yesterday, as in bees can only sting once so are generally pretty even tempered whereas wasps can sting lots of times so are, to use King's words "total full-bore lunatics." I thought that was kinda cool, I must mention it to the princess tonight. Right now she's scared of both so I'm trying to at least curb her fear of bees. Funny thing is, a few years ago she loved bees, thought they were the neatest little things; she's always hated wasps though, I can't help that one, won't even try.
Have a great week folks.
Posted by OldGuy at 1:12 PM | Comments (5)